Foto Friday #6

I once heard a comedian talk about women and their purses. She talked about how you can tell a lot from a person by their purse choices. I fell somewhere between the girl scout (always prepared) to the indecisive (always changing). I actually typically use a gallon sized Ziploc bag (give or take a gallon sized Ziploc bag) with all the things I could ever possibly maybe need if I got caught in a tsunami and was stranded under rubble for a month was out an about with six kids. I move this bag (or bags, if Josh ends up verifying the information) from purse to purse depending on my mood or the color of my outfit. Well, once Tait came and I was back to carrying a diaper bag I ended up moving my Ziploc bags to a backpack and leaving it in the car. Since then, I've been really bad at changing my purse out too and so I bought a purse that will pretty much go with everything. Well, I decided to clean that purse out and when I started to do it, after not doing it since we've moved......uhhhh...9 weeks ago I thought to myself "I'm sure the readers want to know what is in my purse" and even if you don't that's too bad, because that is what this foto Friday is all about!

The purse:

wallets...a necessity!

an envelope with a tuft of Taits hair from his first hair cut

hand sanitizer...can't ever be too clean

samples of shampoo.....you never know when you might need to stop at the gas station and do a cleansing treatment

receipts that I opted "to keep with me" instead of "in the bag"

a love note from my mister

a mysterious car lighter

a book I picked up yesterday for Josh...I'll be sure to let everyone know how THAT works out!

gum, gum, and more gum....that I didn't know I've had

chapstick in any flavor or brand you so chose

spare change roaming around the bottom of the purse

Easter cards to be mailed out for my nieces and nephews and of course for Tait

brochures of things we've done, are planning to do, or looked like we should do

a slew of bouncy balls...... because.....Josh wanted red! When I got the red one he was determined to get himself one.

the name says it all.....they're handy wipes

How in the world did all of this fit in there? I'm a professional!

Clearly, I haven't gotten to the chapter in this book(that was also in my purse) that tells you not to display the contents of your purse because frankly....PEOPLE DON'T CARE!!

warning: You should not try this at home. Side effects include but are not limited to: bad back, frustration from your husband when he's looking for something and you announce "it's in my purse" , kids who think you are the keeper of all of their things, strain on cashiers as you cannot find your wallet but you know "it's in here", stares and whispers when things are falling out of your purse as you search for your keys in a parking lot. All contents listed above are verifiably true to be taken from the inside of said purse.

A digital greeting card by Smilebox

New Project

OK, so some of you are already familiar with my new project, but for those of you who are not I wanted to share.

When Josh and I adopted Graysie (May 9, 2002) we knew then that we wanted an open adoption. It's not that we thought it was the only way it could be done or that through experience or countless hours of research we found this was the best adoption plan. No, actually, the reality is that we were just not willing to look our child in the eyes and answer the "tough" questions we knew she would have someday. We weren't willing to be the ones to explain who's hands she had with an "I don't know!" as an answer. We really wanted to be able to pawn off all those adoption related issues to be perfectly honest with you, I mean seriously I wish I had that for all my kids!

After we got through our adoption (and the first tough months for all of us involved) we realized we had a great thing going. We realized that this gift we were given is one of the most precious things to us and our family. We realized that in return our gift to Amanda was that she could rest assured that her baby was loved and adored by many. On May 9Th 2002, we not only adopted Graysie but we adopted her birth mom, Amanda, as well. We have loved her fully through some ups in downs in all of our lives. We have looked at her like a younger sibling, not always agreeing with her choices, but completely loving her.

We knew right away just from talking to other adoptive parents and birth moms that although we weren't the only ones doing adoption this way, we definitely wanted to share our story. We've recently started a blog at: DearGraysie.com where we will be writing to Grayise, letters from each of our perspectives on our adoption journey. Although it's just getting started, what we have in the works will really be emotional and informative, real and raw truth. I'd love for all of you to join as followers and show your support (if not for me, for Amanda who is braving the emotions of it all, again.) and to pass it along to anyone you know is an adoptive mom, birth mom, adoptee, or just might like to get the inside scoop! Our dream was Oprah but since it's her last season and we haven't been called yet, I guess we are having to settle for our own personal blog!

Thanks for your support and I can't wait to see ya all there!

Car Art

We noticed right away when we moved here that people use bumper stickers to distinguish their hunk-a-junk from every other car on the road. I don't just mean a bumper sticker here or there either...I mean they decorate their cars with these things! It's a little over the top if you ask me, but I like it!

I'm not sure of the real reason behind the bumper stickers. I have a few ideas of my own, consisting of irritating the neighbors with political views and in-laws to name a few. While driving down the road I can tell who's children go to what school, what activities they enjoy, where they go to church and who they voted for in the last presidential election. Like in any aspect of life, some people go further than others as far as what they are willing to share with any innocent passer by. What church do you go to? There's a bumper sticker! What beach do you prefer? There's a bumper sticker! Is the president doing a good job? There's a bumper sticker! What city do you live in? There's a bumper sticker! Do you prefer Piggly Wiggly over Harris Teeter? There's a bumper sticker! Did your child get beat up last week? There's a bumper sticker! Is your house going into foreclosure? go ahead, get the bumper sticker! Lost five pounds, gained ten more? Here's a bumper sticker for you!

Here are some examples:

Knowing that I have six very different children I was thinking of what their future cars will look like and here's what I've come up with:

Emma: She will have a great looking car on the outside and yet when she opens the doors things will come piling out. As she tries to sit in her seat she will have to move all the junk, including but not limited to, all her clothes that she's "misplaced" in the last month and any "important" documents she needs. Her bumper stickers will be falling off. Although I am sure they will be important women's rights issues, no one will be able to read them because she didn't want to take the time while putting them on to clean the surface of the car first.

Kaidon: His car will be a rough and tough boy toy! It will be perfectly spotless on the inside even though at any given point you could probably fall through the rusted floor. He will want something he can find adventure in, because as we all know, adventures out there! He will have very few bumper stickers, but the ones he is willing to share he will die by.

Mihya: Mihya's car will be whatever has the highest safety ratings at the time she purchases it. She won't care how it looks as long as she knows she could drive off a cliff and walk out alive. Her car will be tattered with bumper stickers protecting the environment and protecting animals. She will have them perfectly placed so that none of them obstruct her view while she's driving.

Graysie: She will not have a car unless it sparkles and shines. Her interior will probably be hidden under fuzzy pink seat covers. Her steering wheel will be bedazzled along with anything else she thinks isn't sparkling enough. Her bumper stickers will be to accessorize the color of her car, she wont even care what they actually say. I'm sure she will have a custom paint job so that she can stand out amongst all the other cars on the road.

Mikael: He will have a car that is the most practical. His oil will be changed and tires rotated at the precise mile the dealer recommends. He probably wont subject his car to the infantile bumper sticker for fear his views may change and he'd possibly have to explain "why" to someone. He may look in every gas station, visitors center, or anywhere else bumper stickers are sold but he would never actually commit and buy one.

Kayela: Kayela will probably not have a car because she'd prefer to hitch a ride with a friend or ride the light rail so she could have someone to talk to. If she did go ahead and purchase a car it would just have a big custom window art covering the entire back window that simply read: Call me at 123-4567 I NEED TO TALK!!

And....In our attempts to fit in, here is the start of my collection. Can you "uncover" anything about us?

Foto Friday #5

The sun between my neighbors houses, over the water this Friday morning.(the picture looks weird taken from my phone, but it was really pretty) It's going to be 77 degrees and I am getting out of the house today.

Mihya is having such a great time in school. Her teacher is AWESOME! She is a former Marine and her friend who is also a 3rd grade teacher is a former Army girl. These two have a blast rubbing off their love for the military on these eager learners. Each class has their own march song and morning workout (really they do push-ups) song. I am going to get it on video soon so I can post it, it is adorable! They had a "friendly"game of flag football yesterday that I went and watched. Army vs. Marines....not telling who won, but you know if it was the right team I'd be spreading that like wildfire:)

Mihya was actually one of the few girls who played (shocking) but then she joined the cheerleaders!

Here is a typical scene in our neighborhood. An alligator laying out in the sun! Look close, I couldn't get a better shot on my iPhone.

Same Old New Thing

I am trying very hard to lose weight. Actually, come to think of it, I am always trying very hard to lose weight. I always say my body has not communicated with my scale about the effort I have been putting out though. No, I feel like I should see much bigger results than I do, considering I feel like I am being tortured to death by my fat thighs and sugar cravings! As it's been said before, "desperate times call for desperate measures" and at this point I am DESPERATE! Remember, I have to be swim suit material now... not just a couple months a year, but for like practically the whole year! That, my friends, is almost worth crying over.

For Valentine's day Josh got me a gift that most wives would seek out marriage counseling for, and yet I was thrilled to death. I got a diet book. Now, Josh knew I wanted a diet book, I had talked up the diet book, I had begged for the diet book and yet when he handed me my Valentine's day gift you should have seen him squirming. Had I not been so excited I could have really pulled off some awesome prank. Cracks me up to even think of all the things I could have done to get him really good. Needless to say, I was so caught up in the fact that I got my diet book I didn't think quick enough. I know, I know you are thinking "oh, Lord, we've got to get her into some therapy!" and although therapy would help me in many other arenas of my so called life, right here and now, a diet book is just what I needed.

So, for the past three weeks I have eaten things that are mostly green and grow from the ground. As a matter of fact, as I type this I am eating steamed asparagus. (Sorry Amanda you probably are still having nightmares about me feeding you canned asparagus when you came to visit years ago) I have exercised which I hate...no, I loathe! I have even done some muscle building workouts and, I'm sure you remember, I've even been rollerblading. I pulled one butt muscle and I'm limping around the house because my knees hurt. I couldn't laugh for two days because my stomach muscles were so sore, I even told Emma to stop being funny 'cause "everything hurts". Well, yesterday was my tell all day where I was going to weigh-in and measure how much thinner I was. Obviously, I wouldn't be posting about it had it not been such a HUGE number! I mean this number is so unbelievable I had to share it.....I lost 1 in.! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?? I AM SO MAD!! ONE MEASLY LITTLE INCH? I AM SUFFERING much more than that!!

Poor Josh got an email from me yesterday just totally discouraged about the whole thing. He was sweet and offered to take back the diet book since it didn't work. OK, so he didn't, but he was very sweet and encouraged me to keep going (because I'm not sure of my exact words but I said something like "if I'm suffering and not seeing results I would rather just eat and drink what I want and sit around watching soap operas!" Josh did his whole little "task over time always gets results" speech, which in lam ins terms means "duh, you idiot you thought that eating like crap for years, having 3 pregnancies, not exercising and a diet for two weeks was getting you into swim suit shape...heelllllooooo??" I haven't turned desperate enough for this again but maybe its because I don't have mean neighborhood ladies who like to see me suffer.......I mean..... friends who care about me so much here in SC. So, I'm going to keep up with this whole big diet disaster, but I'm not happy about it at all!

Memories Monday:

Guess who the little poser is in our family!

Here's a hint:

These are all pictures before Mikael and Kayela joined our family since I like digging back in time for memories Monday. Although, trust me she has not changed a bit!

Way too many photos to count that we have to hold her still so she doesn't "upstage" every one else. She's so fun!

Foto Friday #4

OK, So I know I promised that I would designate Fridays as a day with just pictures and little chat, but some things just have to be explained so you'll have to go with it. Here's my new hair:

I've had it about a week now and I'm really liking it. You'll see here and here why I wanted/needed new hair! I think it's a spunky, fun, classy, casual look if there ever were such a thing. It's a big change considering I had my last hairdo for a few years. Gasp, horror! I know, I know to some of you who change your hair like you change your under ware that is a huge sin, but for me I just can't risk a change that may inadvertently hinder my already microscopic self esteem, so when I find hair I like...it stays!!

This picture here makes me look like I am guilty. Its as if I'm saying "Hi, I'm Ambyr and I'm a recovering box color user! I was recovered for fifteen years when I relapsed recently and had to experience what my choices do to those I know and love including myself! It was so refreshing to finally get the nerve up and see a professional, and I think I'm back on track now and can really understand how to keep myself away from the things that may put me into a downward spiral." Just had to share that one, so josh knows that this will NEVER happen again..for at least another fifteen years or so.

This picture is how the stylist intended on my hair looking(or the best reproduction I could come up with). I just really can not pull this look off. I mean seriously, I have six kids, I need to be able to see out of both eyes! The kids would come to talk to me, "oh, honey mommy's sorry you're going to need to be on my left side remember? Mommy can't see out of her right eye!" This just wouldn't work for me. I guess my other option would be if they were coming up on the right I could turn my whole body entirely around every time they needed me "Ooops! Mommy's not in a swivel chair so you're going to need to come around on the left darling!". For the first few hours I even really tried to keep it across my eye like that and Josh kept reminding me "babe, she had it in front" but I just couldn't pull it off! Actually, when I see people who can pull it off I want to march across the room and put their hair behind their ears and say "there....all better!" because it irritates me. You know how they do it too, how they have to turn their heads all awkward in order to see. When I thought about that, I realized that I should just be good with it behind my ears!

So, again, I'm sorry I just can't post the awful breast fed baby poop color I had going on, but hopefully you'll forgive me since I posted my new do!

Passion Vs.___________

Josh and I have talked a lot lately about me finding a passion. We've talked about how important it would be for me in dealing with our suddenly quiet house in a suddenly foreign city. We've talked about things that I enjoy doing and the things I am naturally talented at. We've talked about trying new things that may spark a passion. We've talked about people we know who claim they've found their passion. Long story short, we've talked many hours about passion....and yet, I'm still not all that clear on what "passion" really is to be quite honest with you.

The person fighting for women's rights, is this passion or an activist?

The person wanting justice for her child, is this passion or revenge?

The person punching the clock fifty plus hours a week, passion or a work-a-holic?

The person growing his 401k, passion or greed?

The person always wanting more, passion or not content?

The person who loves college sports, passion or couch potato?

The person who exercises daily, passion or insecure?

The person who loves purses and shoes, passion or over indulgent?

The person who stays home with her children, passion or over protective?

The person who wants everything organized, passion or obsessive?

The person who is a faithful servant, passion or legalistic?

The person who strives to be the best at their career, passion or seeking recognition?

As you can see here sometimes what others think my passion may be is so far off that it's comical. Sometimes how others view what I am doing can seem like passion and yet it's really just duty or obligation or expectations and not passion at all. I got this letter from Mihya just two days ago:

It sparked a few chords for me. First of all, what a sweet girl to say she "appreciates" me and second of all I realized that this "passion seeking" is something that I can only do for myself. I can not rely on anyone else to find me a passion and I can't rely on anyone else to judge if what I have found is truly a passion. (This may be an inappropriate time to mention this, and yet I feel it necessary to say that I am so going to start complaining more about all the cleaning I do because clearly no one understands that I DO NOT ENJOY IT!!). If it was up to my family I think they'd stamp "approved" on all my cleaning, call it a passion and be done with it!

Just this past weekend I met someone who I think has true passion. This guy was the epitome of passion! This guy spit when he talked and had a skip in his step (thank you Josh for that quote) when anyone mentioned what he was passionate about. He met each person who was not familiar with his passion with extreme excitement and a true desire to teach them everything you would ever need to know about his passion. He had a story to tell. A history to recall. Real joy when he spoke of his passion. I'm sure by now you are thinking OK,OK get on with it...what was his passion? His passion..... is peanuts! Yep, you've got that right, peanuts! I know you probably are trying not to laugh right now, and that's alright because guess what? He probably wouldn't even notice because his passion is so prevalent in his life that he is blind to anyone else who doesn't see it. This guy stands on the side of the road and is passionate about selling boiled peanuts. If you have not been educated on boiled peanuts, I will give you his website and his facebook (we got them last weekend) and you will be ignorant no more. At first glance you'd think this guy was a nut job (get it? haha! nut job! haha....OK, sorry) but the reality is, you have to admire the person who has so much passion they are exuding it.

With all of that said, I am now on a path to find my passion.(...do you seek out a passion or just stumble upon it?) to find something I am so excited and good at that I pour out so much energy into it, and in the end am only energized by the effort I put forth. I'm beginning to realize that my passion may be judged poorly by others and yet, I too will end up blind to the ridicule because my passion overshadows their negativity and persecution. Maybe people can say I'm not coping well or that losing Tait has sent me off the deep end or that I'm selfish or compulsive or obsessive or lazy or over protective or not content or anything else people say when someone dives head first into something they are passionate about. Maybe they'll say it, but guess what I think I'm realizing? I think I'm realizing that only I will know for sure when I have found my passion and only I can find true happiness within that passion. Until then...I'll be cleaning!

Things I LOVE!

I hate my days without Tait. My house is empty and quiet five years before I wanted it to be. All my dreams of what would come was destroyed the day we found out he wasn't staying. Our love poured out to him like a faucet, even when we knew he wasn't ours any longer. I'm not sure most people get that just because I wasn't pregnant for nine months didn't mean we didn't love him fully as if he were our own. From the moment I looked into those big green eyes, I saw MY baby! I saw my baby every time he smiled and showed his giant dimpled cheeks. When he cried, I felt his pain and when he whimpered I knew exactly what he was telling me. We wanted Tait long before he ever existed and long before most of you know. We planned on Tait for six years before we actually held him in our arms and called him ours. What we didn't plan on was losing him. What we didn't plan on, was how bad this hurt would be for us.

Daily, hourly and minute by minute we are reminded of our loss. We are reminded of things that will never be again. When I wake the kids in the morning I think about how they should have to be quiet because we shouldn't want to wake the baby. When we go on a walk I am seeing all the great things Tait would love to look at and the fact that we no longer need a stroller. At the grocery store I pass the diaper isle when I should need to be there for another good year. When I set the table we are missing a high chair and no one needs their food cut up in bite size pieces. Getting in and out of the car I am thinking about how I am no longer needed to buckle a car seat or to shade the sun. Josh got a call thanking us for our support of the adoption exchange and he told me a whole story about how they said we were wonderful parents and thanked us for our donation and the whole time he was telling me, I was lost in the thought of "if we are so great, why didn't we deserve to keep our baby?". On cloudy days I am thinking how great it would be to be playing with Taits train on the floor with him and on sunny days I think about how he would love to go on a walk. I miss his sister who said she didn't want another baby because she didn't like them and changed her mind the second she looked at him. When we talk about the beach I remember how he hated the cold ocean water when we were in California and how he loved the feeling of sand in his toes. I miss seeing his over protective sister loving him and reading books to him in her bed while he sat just staring at her. When the kids get home from school and I am the only one greeting them, I wonder if they miss his squeals of delight when they walk through the door. I miss that he had a 12 year old sister who adored him and loved taking showers with him and would act like his second parent. I miss his smell and his cry and his double jointed thumbs. I think about how he must feel like we didn't want him because we couldn't tell him we did, we so did! I saw a bird get hit by a car yesterday and I cried and cried because I related to flying along happily one minute and the very next moment realizing you were headed for disaster. Secretly I'm grateful that we no longer have a rocking chair in our house even though I know it's "therapy" for Josh, because Tait used to sit on Josh's lap and shove back to get Josh moving, and I would have to remember that each time I saw him rock. I miss his big brother who wrestled with him and would let Tait beat him up. Every thought is consumed with Tait and how I miss his presence in our family, how I miss him more than anyone would ever know by looking at me.

With every thought wrapped around such sadness I am having to make concentrated efforts to focus on the things I love. Focusing on the things that I still have and need to cherish because God only knows how long I will have them. I need to focus on these things daily, hourly and minute by minute to keep me headed in the right direction and to keep me grateful for the many things I am so privileged to have. So here's to all the things in my life that are blissful, wonderful and give me a reason to smile each day. These are the things I LOVE:

• When Josh calls throughout his work day to share his successes, failures and triumphs...I love this!
• When Emma laughs out loud at my blog....I love this!
• When Kayela has a compliment for each person she comes in contact with...I love this!
• That my nieces are adopted...I love this!
• How Kaidon was graced with a servants heart...I love this!
• Knowing Josh tries not to wake me up in the morning...I love this!
• How Mihya has a love for all creatures, so much so that it's hard to please her at meal times.....I love this!
• How my brother interacts with his boys....I love this!
• My friendship with Pam....I love this!
• Seeing Mikael trying to hold his smile in...I love this!
• Watching how Amanda cherishes her role as a mommy, and knowing she loves Graysie too....I love this!
• Watching down syndrome kids and how they are always joyful...I love this!
• Knowing we finally did what we always said we were going to do.....I love this!
• Realizing I have freedom of speech and many other freedoms most people don't have...I love this!
• Knowing when I leave the room P.D. will follow me.....I love this!
• Getting comments on my blog....I love this!
• laughing with my kids about things no one else thinks is funny....I love this!
• Taking vacations I dreamed about as a kid...I love this!
• Emma being everything I wished I was as a person....I love this!
• Knowing Graysie is always so happy that she can't help but skip and dance....I love this!
• Getting texts from my friends kids saying we've impacted their lives.....I love this!
• Being able to laugh at myself when everyone else is shaking their head in disbelief......I love this!
• How I know when my dad is at work because I get flooded with emails....I love this!
• Ichat...I love this!
• Cracking up over what people will share on facebook!....I love this!
• Rain storms that flood the streets...I love this!
• Hosting parties...I love this!
• Hand written letters....I love this!
• Little girls in big bows......I love this!
• Disney....I love this!
• Knowing that when Josh's eyes meet mine he knows if I'm about to laugh or cry.....I love this!
• Looking at old pictures.....I love this!

Just a few of the many reasons to keep smiling today!

On a Roll!

We had so many hours of talking on our drive out to SC. We talked about anything and everything you can think of and the kids really, really , really took advantage of our undivided attention. On one particular moment in my car I had the girls answering questions. In part because I wanted to know, and in part because if someone didn't keep talking I would have fallen asleep. I asked them questions in regards to our family life like "what is something you want to leave behind in Colorado?", "What is something you'd like to keep the same?","What is something you are going to do better?", "What is something you're going to try?" and so many others. They had some really off the wall answers sometimes and at other times they shocked me at their ingenuity. With each question I asked them, they would ask me the same ones and I had fun answering them because this was a "new start" for all of us!

To the question "What is something you are going to try and do better?" my answer was roller blade. If you know me at all, you know that I often fall up stairs, I have been known to trip on nothing and wind up on the floor, I went to a step surprise class one evening at the health club and the only surprise was by the other participants realizing how uncoordinated a person (yours truly) can be! In a nutshell, I am not one you'd want running in front of you in a race let alone on wheels! On the other hand, Emma is a rock star roller blader!! She has no fear about trying new things and often when she decides to try something she has it mastered in very few attempts. Emma doesn't like the roller blades with the brakes on the back either because she "t-stops" and so she will only wear street hockey blades. Emma can be going 90 miles an hour in one direction and with the sound of her name she whirls around and is heading back another direction. As she roller blades, like she has rockets on the back of her heels, if something gets in her way she doesn't go around it, no, no, that would lose the dramatic effect, she just jumps over it! The girl could make it big in roller derby I tell you! She has the personality and aggressiveness to pull it off without a hitch. So, when I answered the girls with the fact that I wanted to be better at rollerblading I swear to you the reaction I got was the same reaction I would have gotten had I said I was giving them all up for adoption! It was like a horrified chorus of "mom, really? oh no! seriously? Are you sure? why that? do you know how hard that is?" They really had me defeated before I even put the roller blades on, which made me want to prove to the little boogers even more that if I have the super hero power to pop them out of my womb, I can roller blade for god's sake! ...well...maybe!

The driving force of my answer was two fold. You see, I bought a pair of roller blades two years ago along with a jogging stroller. The blades for exercise, the jogging stroller to help me stop while on the roller blades! I used the contraption once and it really did work out pretty amazingly. I looked like a great mom with 5 kids on bikes or blades, one in the jogger and me on roller blades myself. The only problem is that after I told Kayela "if mommy starts to yell "stop! stop!" you need to insert your foot into the front tire of the jogger so we don't go crashing into anything OK honey?" she had some fear about getting back into the darn thing! When Tait came along he wasn't heavy enough if I needed to lean on the handle bars while having a vulture death grip on the brake so, short story long, I never attempted to go out again! I was determined (on that whim in the car) that I was going to roller blade! Emma asked me how exactly I was going to attempt this near impossible feat and I told her "that's simple, I'm going to practice!" but in my mind I was thinking "that's right, practice! ......Just as soon as our insurance cards come in the mail!".

This past weekend was my time to shine! Not only did I want to roller blade for the sheer enjoyment of it, but I also want to find something I really like to do that will get my heart rate up and my butt to disappear. So, while the kids were out playing and Josh was jumping on the trampoline I decided it was my moment. I got out those darn roller blades and after dusting them off I put the things on my feet and stood up in the driveway! That's where I stood for a good ten minutes too! No movement and a lot of "if you bump into me you are so busted!" being shouted at several of my children. I finally decided to move my feet and when I didn't fall I moved them more and more until I was scooting around the driveway. The kids were all having races down the driveway, down the alley, into the street, around the crab dock circle, back up the alley and into the driveway while I managed up and down the driveway. Josh was supporting my attempts with video camera in hand, I could have killed him and he caught many not so loving moments of ours on tape in that 5 minutes of video. I got better and better and finally was going down the alley when Mihya fell in the street and I zoomed on my little purple roller blades out to grab her! I didn't fall and was so proud of myself. Then we went up and down the sidewalks and again, no falls from me! I was totally psyched!

Sunday morning Josh went on a bike ride so I told the kids we were going to go get some sunshine and head towards the pool. Their is a path the whole way so I figured I would roller blade and they could use any form of transport they choose as long as they could keep up with the group. The boys decided to ride bikes, Kayela chose scooter and the rest of us were on roller blades. We set out on our path, Emma in the lead and me bringing up the rear. All was going really well and I managed to be making it on and off the sidewalks just fine, which was a worry of mine. The path doesn't have any big hills down either, which was another worry of mine and so I was looking like I might know how to roller blade. At one point though I stepped off the sidewalk onto the street and almost wiped out. I had my hands going in big circles and I let out a little yelp when Emma in no time flat was at my side. I didn't actually fall but I did cause a lot of stares from other patrons on the path and Emma found great humor in that. While scooting along, I announced to her that although I am managing not to fall she looks a bit more natural and graceful than I do, so that is my next goal. Right at that moment Graysie fell at the bottom of the hill, followed by Kayela and there I went zooming down the hill realizing I have not yet tried to stop!! Complete panic swept across my face in which Emma found great humor and started laughing so hard she was swerving in front of me all over the path and losing control! It was like the clowns in the circus playing out right before my eyes and all that I can think about is "I'm not going to fall!". At one point Emma had her arms flailing trying to regain her balance just inches from me and I did what any good mother would do at that moment and I shoved her with every ounce of muscle I had in me off the path and into the trees! I seriously, totally shoved her butt right off the path, but I did not fall! Once our circus routine was over we laughed until we were crying over the fact that any other mother would have probably taken a fall for her child and yet here I was shoving mine out of the way so I didn't end up hurt! Memories were made, fun was had!

Once we got back home we were still laughing and talking of our near death experience and I said "well, I knew I didn't know how to stop and I knew I didn't know how to turn so I had to shove you out of the way or it was going to get pretty ugly!" With that Emma stopped laughing and stared into my eyes intently before saying "mom, those are pretty important things to know when roller blading. It's like going skiing and not knowing how to turn or stop!" I told her maybe I need some more practice.

Memories Monday

OK, so I'm doing it again! I just can't help but post some of these old really sweet pictures of my kids. It is bringing back so many memories of them when they were little and so many memories I can honestly say I didn't really enjoy as I was in the moment. Not that I didn't enjoy my time, just that I was so emotionally and physically drained that I couldn't enjoy it to the fullest.

Here are some pictures of Graysie that I think are adorable. These were taken in 2003 when she was just 18 months old. At this point she could only say "dah" and said it repeatedly for everything she was saying. It made her frustrated and definitely tried the patients of many adults in her life. Glad to say at 7, it's a non-issue, the girl can talk!!

Taken at a park in Glenwood Springs, Colorado.

Playing in the driveway with the hose. She looks so much like Amanda here. I don't know why but when I look at this picture for some reason I remember this as a day she bit practically every child on our cul-de-sac! Funny, since their isn't any sign of it here but I sure remember that clearly!

At Disney World in the Honey I shrunk the kids play area. She kept disappearing on us and thinking it was so funny when she would "reappear" and we would tell her not to run off. This was the stage when she could only wear stride rite shoes or her feet would blister and I still swear by them. If you have a toddler buy some, its worth the money!

We all used to get so frustrated with her because she insisted on looking around the camera at us when we took her picture. Now, 6 years later, some of these are my favorite shots! Glad I didn't delete them.

Foto Friday #3

Downtown Charleston last weekend when one of the cruise ships was ported. The kids are now begging to go on a cruise. Josh and I kept laughing and saying "can you believe we live in a place that cruise ships port?"

Kids at Fort Moultrie. Yes ALL of my kids, even the one in the back doing bunny ears! Sorry SC if you're in love with Fort Moultrie, we have seen it once and I think that's enough for this Colorado brood.

I wanted to take this time to show off how loved we are back in Colorado. Postcards came in like crazy with some of the nicest messages! Thank you all, and we're missing you too....come visit!!!

P.D. disappeared in the neighbors yard yesterday and this is how he came back. Clearly, he has not read "How to Win Friends and Influence People".

My sassy..uh..I mean ...sweet girls this beautiful Friday morning before catching the bus! Hooray for the weekend!

and last...but not least...

This one is for you Nanette! My nasty hair is hidden under this embellishment NEVER to be revealed! As bad as this looks, it is much better than the "real deal" let me promise you that!